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Jersey Shore Season 2 Premiere Recap: Grenades, Fried Pickles, Landmines, and 20's Pilgrims .  Perfect! | The gang is back and trashing up our TVs and our minds, but this time in Miami, which is basically the Jersey Shore of the south.  Let's get caught up.  Read more...

 

Real Housewives of New Jersey: Jillian Sings at Christine's Sweet 16 | It's time for Christine's charity Sweet 16 with her dad, Tom, and a special song from Jillian.  All terrible.  Meanwhile, come celebrate Teresa and Joe's 10th anniversary.  It's too horrible for words. Fugazi!  Read more...

 

The City Season Finale: Olivia is HUGE in Japan | Olivia kills it in Japan all whilst Whitney is basically cheating on Kelly Cutrone by having "relations" with Allison Brod PR.  How dare she cheat on my Kiko Cutroneski!?  Read more ...

 

My Interview with Kim G from The Real Housewives of New Jersey

 

 

 

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I have no words.  Ok, I have a few.  I’m feeling many mixed emotions now that The Hills is over and I’m having a hard time articulating exactly how this makes me feel.  I researched the brilliance of William Shakespeare, Edgar Allen Poe, Socrates, and Aristotle to help me find the words so that I could place them on paper.  But you know what?  None of them could quite help me.  So I went to my secret back-up person who I knew would be able to help me get my feelings out to the folks at MTV who’ve decided to cancel The Hills and it goes a little something like this:

“You’re so selfish.  You’re self-centered.  All you care about is yourself.”  ~ A. Patridge © 2009

Here’s what went down on the (gulp) final crapisode (sniff) of The (punch to nuts) Hills (shaking fist to the sky):

• The girls are all hanging out and talking about how they’re all going through a mid-20’s-life-crisis.  No one knows what they want to do and what’s next for them.  Well, Lo does.  Lo says she wants little babies.  Does she mean right now?  Like does she want little babies like a kidnapper would or does she want to make little babies?  If she wants to make them she’s sitting the wrong way and someone should tell Steph to get her penis ready then.  Kristin feels like she needs a change.  Maybe she should try the Activia Challenge, but try to hold it in for as long as she can.  Oh, did she mean a bigger change than that?  Oh.  Well, I’m out of ideas then.

• Read the Rest of The Hills Series Finale Recap Here
  

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Real Housewives of New Jersey Recap: The Country Club Triathalon | It's the episode we've all been waiting for.  Teresa is chasing Danielle through the country club all while Jacqueline screams out Danielle's court records (for some reason).  Km G is calming everyone down by screaming "calm down! calm down!" in their face over and over again.  Read more...